


Breathing Out Your Praise.

by Michaelssw0rd



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: BAMF Loki (Marvel), BAMF Tony Stark, Blasphemy, Devotion, Fluff and Angst, Loki Needs a Hug, Loki Redemption, Loki-centric, M/M, Mild Smut, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-27
Updated: 2017-10-27
Packaged: 2019-01-25 04:01:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12522512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Michaelssw0rd/pseuds/Michaelssw0rd
Summary: There are seven Hebrew words for praise and worship. Even though Tony does not know the words, he worships his lover- the god of mischief- in the essence of each of them.





	Breathing Out Your Praise.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MnemonicMadness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MnemonicMadness/gifts).



> HAPPY BIRTHDAY REBECCA YOU SWEET WONDERFUL SOUL. It's finally finished for your birthday. For a while I had given up any faith in this happening. I really hope that in my rush I have not doomed myself, and that you will still enjoy it, and maybe it will brighten up your day a little. ♥
> 
> Also... Here is where I give a shout-out to [Dailyfrostironficrec's ]() wonderful prompt for this month. **Worship**. I was instantly hooked to it, but it took me so very long to get to writing it. (I still am hoping/planning to write the Mermaid AU sometime, but real life is a really annoying). But yeah. THANK YOU for the wonderful prompt!

**_Yadah (yaw-daw’)_ _:_ _to show reverence or praise with extended hands._ **

*

“Avengers. Listen to me. You need to get out of there. Right now.”

Fury’s voice crackled into their earpieces, urgent. Tony ducked, avoiding getting his head crushed by a blow, and kicked the robot in its leg, pushing some of his boot’s thruster power into the hit. He barely had a moment to enjoy incapacitating the enemy before he winced at the sickening crunch of metal grating against metal. While he had been busy fighting the bigger bot, a smaller one had found the weakness between the hinges on his shoulder, and attacked it.

Cursing, he twisted around, pulling the embedded weapon out of his suit, and blasting the bot with repulsor shot. He could feel blood trickling down his arm inside his suit.

Fuck.

He hated the doom-bots.

“Rogers! Get your team of there. That’s an order.”

Tony spared a glance towards the fight happening a few yards away from him, and could understand why Steve couldn’t reply. He was fighting four bots at the same time. He didn’t have any breath left to talk. Tony engaged his boot thrusters and flew towards him, to lend him a hand. Even immortal strength could only last so long.

“Avengers! This place is going to explode in less than five minutes, and I don’t want to be the one explaining to the council how I lost my entire team in what was supposed to be a low threat recon mission.”

“We know that, Fury!” Tony snapped, taking a moment’s break to reply he had to dive back into the fight. “It’s just that-in case it escaped your attention- we are a little preoccupied at the moment.”

“Four minutes, Stark! Clear the area. Now!”

In the air, Tony took a moment to look around. The field was swarming with bots, all of them equipped with an AI that, even while being rudimentary, was intelligent- and adaptable- enough to be a nuisance. One of them jumped into the air to reach him, but he fired a repulsor blast towards it. It won’t be long until the others tried as well, and learned.

SHIELD had discovered one of the hideouts of Dr. Doom, an abandoned facility, and had asked the avengers to rummage through it for information, and pick up any stray technology they could find that might help them in future fights against him. It was supposed to be easy, in and out, and possibly fruitless mission. None of them was expecting the alarms to start blaring the moment they stepped inside, and the self-destruct protocols to activate. The bots were just to ensure nobody left the premises.

He could see Bucky fighting more than a dozen robots a little distance away, and Clint had found a higher post to climb on, shooting arrows with deadly accuracy. And then there was Loki, and Tony couldn’t help but appreciate the way he was using the knives, dancing in the field and dismantling the bad tech, slicing through it like it was butter. He didn’t have even a hair out of place, and Stark had to shake himself out of the trance of watching him. Now was definitely not the time to indulge in his ill-advised infatuation.

Finding everyone being accounted for, he wondered if he could just fly them all out of the blast radius, because there didn’t seem to be any other possible way out.

…wait.

“Cap, where is Widow?”

That made Steve stumble, the bot he was fighting getting the momentary upper hand and making him fall to the ground.

“For fuck’s sake,” Tony cursed, diving forward and fighting off the robot climbing on top of Steve, while Steve hastily picked himself back up.

“Natasha?”

“I don’t know.” The worry in Cap’s voice chilled Tony. He shook his head, unwilling to believe anything had happened to her, and spoke into the open channel.

“Hey Widow! How are you spinning? Caught any spiders in your web yet?”

Nobody answered, until Clint’s voice tentatively broke the silence. “I don’t see her.”

Fuck. That meant she hadn’t made it out of the building with the rest of them. And they hadn’t even noticed.

“JARVIS. Can you read her life signs?”

“Miss Romanoff’s tracker places her inside the building, still alive. Although, her heart rate is erratic, and I suspect she might be in need of medical attention.”

“No shit,” Tony cursed again.

“One minute left.” Fury’s voice was trembling with anxiety, and dare Tony say concern. He couldn’t exactly blame him.

“If you all will excuse me for a minute,” That was Loki’s voice. Quite infuriatingly, he didn’t even sound out of breath. “I have something to do.”

“Son of a bitch,” Clint exclaimed. “He just vanished. Disapprated or some shit. Reformed my ass… I knew he will choose to save his own skin if it ever came to that.”

“Shut up, Hawkeye.”

Tony looked towards where Loki had been holding his own a few moments ago, and saw no trace of him. Refusing to acknowledge what that meant- Loki was better than that, he would never turn his back on his comrades. More importantly, Tony suspected Loki _couldn’t_ turn his back on them, from what he had understood of his deal with Odin, and the terms of his penance. He pushed away that thought and made a decision. Somebody had to, and they were running out of time.

“That’s it. We are getting out of here.” He grabbed Steve, ignoring his squawk, and flew into the air, as fast as he could. When he was fairly sure they were out of the blast range, he dropped Cap, and flew back in.

“Twenty seconds.”

Bucky had already fought his way out, and Tony suspected this was as safe as they could get given the situation. So he routed more power towards his thrusters, going faster, and found Clint in hand to hand combat with half a dozen robots, and losing fast. He punched one, kicked the feet out of the other, and grabbed Clint.

It was too late.

“Brace yourselves!” Fury’s voice called out, and Tony did the only thing he could think of. He crouched over Clint, covering him with his suit, and closed his eyes.

The sound of the blast washed over them, and Tony waited for the shock wave and the heat to follow it. It took him a few moments to realize it wasn’t coming.

He stood up, slowly, and turned around, anxiety and worry twisting in his stomach, and he resolutely blocked the memory of Natasha from this morning, laughing while eating cereal. He had to know what had stopped them from being burned to a crisp.

The answer made Tony gape in awe. The abandoned facility was covered in a green shield, and inside it he could see dust, and rubble and fire, barely settling, striking against the shield and making it glow with sparks of bright green energy.

It was breathtaking.

“Jesus Christ!”

“Wrong deity, but I do appreciate the sentiment.”

Tony whipped around, and saw Loki materialize out of thin air in front of him.

“Loki.” He threw his hands up in the air, laughing in relief that he was he okay, that he was still here. That he hadn’t abandoned them. And then he noticed the slumped figure in his arms and let out a cry of relief again. Clint noticed too, standing up suddenly and coming towards them.

“Nats,” he exclaimed, carefully taking her from Loki’s arms. Loki let her go with obvious relief, his face strained. Behind them, the force field still held strong.

Tony spared a glance towards Natasha, noticing that despite the blood covering her, her chest still moved regularly. Then, his eyes fixated on the man who had saved her; saved all of them.

No, not a man. A man couldn’t have contained a massive blast inside a bubble of his magic. Loki was more than that.

“You’re a son of a bitch you know that?” Tony finally brought his hands down, placing them on the back of his head and smiled at Loki. The softness of his voice ruined the impact of his insult, but he didn’t care. He had almost died; he was allowed a moment of weakness.

Something in Loki’s features seemed to give. Tony had not even known there was a mask, until it fell away. Loki smiled at him, a rare, genuine smile, and nodded.

“So I have been told.”

Tony’s heart skipped a beat as he watched Loki bend down next to Clint. Loki ran his hands over Natasha’s wounds, muttering something under his breath until the thick blood oozing out of her slowed and stopped, performing miracles with the touch of his hand a whisper of his voice. Tony suddenly realized he was in deeper mess than he had anticipated.

He rubbed his hands on his face, suddenly exhausted.

“Oh God.”

He could’ve bet he saw Loki’s lips twitch at that.

* * *

 **Towdah (to-daw’):** _t **o**_ **_extend or raise your hands in thanksgiving for something that hasn’t yet occurred or that you haven’t yet received._ **

*

Tony had fucked up.

But in his defense, he wasn’t really thinking. He never made a conscious decision to step in front of the projectile aimed at Loki’s back. He never told his muscles to move. He never chose Loki’s life over his own.

It just happened.

So it was entirely unfair that Loki was standing next to his hospital bed, entirely unimpressed and ungrateful, and glared.

“What in the name of Norns did you think you were doing, Stark?”

Tony wondered if it was too late to pretend to be dead. The monitors would definitely give him away. Or, Loki would revive him just to kill him again. He definitely looked furious enough to do that. So Tony chose to look at the god defiantly- as defiant as he could look, in a baby blue hospital gown and hooked to one too many tubes to count- and shrugged.

It seemed to annoy Loki further. “What were you hoping for? My gratitude? My debt? My favor?” Tony couldn’t help but flinch at the words, at the truth hiding in those taunts that Loki could never ever find out. Still, he couldn’t help but snap.

“I was hoping to save you.”

“Save me?” Loki laughed derisively. “Did you happen to forget I am immortal? I thought you were considered a genius on this pitiful planet; how did you not realize that something like that couldn’t even hope to hurt me? It would’ve barely stung.”

Tony could only handle so much bullshit. “Oh I believe it would’ve more than just stung.”

 The projectile had pierced through his armor, and activated once it was inside his flesh, shattering into multiple pieces. He had barely just managed to not bleed out, and if Loki would just shut up, he would thank him for it. Clint told him how Loki had stopped the blood and magically frozen his body in some form of voodoo cryostasis until they reached hospital, and had apparently kept doing that through the six hour surgery as well. The circles under his eyes spoke of the fact that nobody was supposed to tax their magic so much.

“I am a lot more resilient than you.”

“Maybe. You can’t know that for sure. Those weapons were designed to fight superheroes, and you were not exactly at your best.”

Loki looked at him strangely, a contradictory mixture of anger and vulnerability shining in his eyes, and Tony really couldn’t take it. He sat up straighter against the pillows and smiled, a little sadly.

“Look, if it eases your conscience, I didn’t really think about it. I didn’t chose to take a bullet for you. I am like that. Reckless. Have a death wish. You can ask Fury if you don’t believe me. It’s on my report. So you don’t have to take it personally alright? And as I have been informed, you saved my life in return, so there’s no _debt_. We are even. Fair and square.”

The anger fell away from Loki’s expressions as he spoke, and Tony wouldn’t have thought that it would feel _worse._ Worse than when Loki was snarling at him. Because now Loki looked lost, and Tony ached with the need to help him home. _To become his home_ \- a traitorous voice in his brain whispered but Tony had grown used to ignoring that particular part of his subconscious.

“Why?” Loki asked, and there was so much fear in that statement that Tony’s heart broke.

He considered answering truthfully, but he had already bled for Loki once, quite profusely at that, and he found that he wasn’t ready to do that again just yet. He had never claimed to be brave. “I told you. It wasn’t you. I would’ve done the same for anyone.”

That was the wrong thing to say, because Loki’s face shuttered close. Stupid. Lying to the god of lies. How did he expect to not get caught?

“Anyone,” Loki intoned, his voice devoid of all emotions, and his eyes cold. “I suppose you’re right. There’s no debt owed here. Now, if you will excuse me…”

Loki was running, that’s what he was doing, and suddenly Tony realized he didn’t want that. He had a feeling that if he let Loki leave now, all the distance they had covered in the last few months, the tentative friendship they had built, would be lost. He couldn’t allow that.

Loki turned away, walking towards the door, and Tony’s hand shot forward, reaching out and finding empty air.

“Loki!”

Even he could hear the fragility in his voice, so Loki must’ve too, cause he paused, and then took a deep breath before turning around. He didn’t say anything, and Tony knew that it was up to him to jump through the chasm separating them, even if he felt like he will never make the distance and will drown.

“That wasn’t really true,” he swallowed. “But the truth is difficult, and also kinda pathetic, and I really really wish you wouldn’t make me say it. Because you know. You _know_. Hell, Steve knows, and Steve usually is the least perceptive person you can find on this planet, on any of the planets really.” He glanced up at Loki, finding his gaze fixated on him, burning with something he couldn’t name. Loki took a step towards him, and then another, not speaking a word

“What I am trying to say is… I wouldn’t have done it for anyone. I did it for you.” There it was, the confession he didn’t want to make. It wasn’t in the words; it was in the way his voice cracked, and the way his eyes mapped Loki’s tired features, hungry for the sight of it, desperately grateful to know that his stupid sacrifice play worked. That Loki lived.

Loki was next to him now, and only when he gently grasped Tony’s hand did he realize that it was still suspended in mid-air, reaching… hoping. He slumped in relief when Loki held it in both hands, caressing it gently. There was such tenderness in his touch that Tony felt a lump form in his throat.

“Why?” Loki asked again, but it was soft this time, almost hopeful.

“Because I didn’t want you to die.” Tony shook his head before Loki could even start to protest, because while that wasn’t a lie, it wasn’t really the truth either. “Because I wanted you to live.”

He looked up at Loki, willing him to understand, and the way a soft smile touched Loki’s lips, achingly gentle, Tony was sure he did.

* * *

 **Barak (baw-rak’):** **_to bow down to, or kneel before, the Lord._ **

*

Loki materialized in Tony’s room and Tony was on his feet at once, rushing towards him. To a casual observer, Loki might have looked the same as usual, but Tony had watched him enough, Loki had let in enough, to know better.

Loki was tearing apart at the seams, and all Tony could do was curse.

“What did the assholes want this time?” Tony was by Loki’s side, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. His heart ached when Loki flinched away from it. If Loki was unwilling to accept affection, it must have been bad.

He swallowed back the sting of rejection and moved his hand again to rest against Loki’s bare neck, the skin under his fingers ice cold, the chill of the frozen realm still clinging to Loki’s flesh, still digging its claws in his heart.

Loki was avoiding his gaze, so Tony firmed his hold, turning his face. Loki’s eyes were unfocused, even now reliving whatever nightmares he had faced after getting called to Jotunheim a week ago.

“Loki! Look at me.” Tony tried to instill some command into his words, but instead it just came out pleading. It worked though, because Loki’s eyes focused on him, and Tony instinctively wanted to recoil from the intensity of it. The horror in the depths of the bright green eyes, the pain, was more than Tony thought he could bear. “What happened?” he asked again.

Loki shook his head, trying to move away, but Tony held firm. Loki could’ve broken his hold if he wanted, so Tony took comfort in the fact that he stayed anyway. “Nothing I didn’t deserve,” Loki said finally. His voice was like shards of ice, cold and cracking.

“That’s bullshit,” Tony disagreed vehemently. “You don’t deserve to be trampled upon whenever they so please. It’s not fair.”

Loki chuckled, and there was nothing humorous about any of it. “I tried to destroy their realm not so long ago. Almost succeeded in the process. Some would say that is exactly what is fair. They are owed their revenge.”

“Revenge wasn’t part of the deal. Odin decreed that you will make up for your actions by helping them rebuild their world, not… not _this_.”

The laugh this time made Tony flinch. “ _Odin._ ” When Loki spoke that name, it made a rage burn inside Tony’s heart that rivalled with the hatred in Loki’s voice. “Our dear, merciful All-father does not forgive slights against himself, and never ones committed by his very own pet project. He knew what he was doing when he set the terms of my penance. There’s nothing in there stopping the Jotun for demanding my blood, my life force, the very essence of my magic as necessary for their rebuilding efforts. Compared to what they could do, this is almost a mercy.”

“But…”

“I have earned this. I am a monster even in the eyes of the race of monsters. They are owed. Let us not talk about it.”

Loki’s eyes hardened but his voice firmed, angry at the world, angry at himself, but the haunted look was replaced by fierce defiance, and for now Tony would take it.

He leaned up and forward and pressed his lips to Loki’s chilled ones, trying to instill some warmth inside him, to chase away the frost, but Loki stood frozen, unresponsive.

Tony knew he will not be able to convince Loki that he wasn’t a monster. Not now. Not after spending heavens knew how long being treated as one. Tony knew he couldn’t just talk Loki into believing that he was exactly the opposite.

But he could show him.

So he ran his fingers through Loki’s hair, smoothed his hands down his shoulders and arms, and then let his knees fold and hit the ground.

Loki gasped above him, uncomfortable with this gesture even on normal days, so Tony waited for him to push him away. When nothing happened even after a few moments, he tentatively looked up and stopped breathing.

Loki was looking down at him, his eyes awed and bright, swimming with something he would never admit- and Tony will never remind him- to be tears. His mouth was wide open, disbelieving, and Tony would’ve scoffed at that if he didn’t know that it would make Loki pull away lightning fast.

Instead, he let his own masks fall away and his lips formed a prayer. “Please.”

Loki shuddered, his back sagging against the wall behind him, his eyes never leaving Tony’s. Tony held the gaze, hiding nothing, not his affection, nor his regard, and nor the anger he felt at the situation. After a long while, Loki took a shaky break, brought his hands to curl in Tony’s hair, and nodded.

Tony sighed in relief. Permission granted, Tony spent the next half hour showing the god what he couldn’t tell him, used his fingers and lips and tongue to press praises and devotions against Loki’s skin, swallowed a hymn around him, his touch reverent and worshipful- the way Loki deserved. The way _he_ was owed.

He coaxed Loki’s pleasure out of him, slowly and unrelentingly, his hot breath aching to reach deep inside of him and warm his heart as it did his flesh. When Loki reached his climax, Tony looked up, and saw the way tears slid down his eyes, still wide open and watching Tony, and thought maybe his prayers were answered after all. And his worship accepted.

He might be imagining it, but when he curled around Loki in the bed afterwards, slinging an arm around his waist, the god was warmer than he had been before.

* * *

 **Tehillah (tel-hil-law’** **_):_ ** **_to sing unrehearsed, unplanned praises._ **

*

Tony loved days like these.

The sun was out, shining brightly, and filtering in through the glass walls of his penthouse. New York was quiet- well as quiet as it could be, with even the super-villains seeming to have taken a break to enjoy the beautiful day. So Tony had made himself a cup of coffee and flopped down on couch with his Stark-pad, humming a tune under his breath. He planned on getting some preliminary design sketches for his new suits done.

A smiled curled around his lips, pleased and content, when Loki entered the room, making the day even brighter. Being a god of chaos was hard on the days where there was no chaos around and you had made a pact to not create any yourself. Not the planet-destroying kind anyway.

He glanced up at his lover, and saw that he was carrying a book in his hand. It didn’t look like it was from earth, so he supposed it was something he brought from his last trip to Asgard. Brilliant. So they were both unwinding in their own way.

Loki caught him looking and raised his eyebrow. Tony smirked right back and gestured towards his lap, enjoying the way the eyebrows climbed higher.

And then, to his utter delight, Loki moved closer and laid down on the couch, feet dangling from the armrests, and placed his head on Tony’s thighs.

Tony was too startled to do anything but gape for a while, but then he noticed the teasing glint in Loki’s eyes and laughed. Loki was still up to the non-planet-destroying mayhems alright.

“Comfortable?” He tried for teasing, but his tone was far too fond.

“Very.” Loki shuffled a little, and then picked up his book and held it above him, seemingly getting absorbed into the text. From Tony’s experience, that was often true.

Tony stared at the God’s face for a few moments, noticing the way his brows were lightly furrowed, his black hair framing his face, his bright eyes focused on his book. His fingers found their way into Loki’s hair, running through it in slow rhythmic strokes. Loki downright purred at his ministrations; somedays, Tony genuinely believed that Loki was part cat. There was something so domestic about the moment that Tony felt his heart flutter inside his chest.

To distract himself, he looked back at the Stark-pad, fiddling with it one handed, as he used the other hand to play with Loki’s hair. Soon, he had to abandon any hope of productivity, it wasn’t the day for it, and he wasn’t in mood for it. Instead, he went back to the study of his immortal lover’s face, of its lines and curves, and dips and ridges. There was a melody stuck in a loop on in his mind, and he kept muttering the lyrics subconsciously as his eyes drank in the sight. He was sure there had not been many people allowed to see Loki quite like this, so up close and vulnerable. And Tony was always afraid that any moment, it could be snatched back from him. So he ran his fingers over Loki’s eyebrows, and traced the curve of his ear, relishing the fact that he was allowed to do so.

He was startled when he felt Loki’s hand on his face, only then noticing that Loki had put his book down on his chest, and was staring at Tony’s face with the same intensity as he had just been staring at Loki with.

“You too,” Loki whispered, quiet and intimate.

“Huh?” Tony felt like he had missed a big chunk of conversation. Loki looked at him curiously, and then shook his head in obvious amusement.

“Nothing.” He went back to reading his book. Tony stared in bafflement for a few moments, and then picked up the pad again, his fingers resuming their stroking. His lips started forming the words they had been humming once again, an old song that he didn’t even know he remembered anymore.

“ _Can’t you see?_  
You’re everything I hoped for.  
You’re everything I need.”

Out of the corner of his eyes he saw a small smile appear on Loki’s lips, and fell quiet all of a sudden. _Oh_. He reviewed the words in his head, and Loki’s response, and this time, when he continued his off-tune singing, his words were deliberate. “ _You are… so beautiful, to me._ ”

* * *

 **Zamar (zaw-mar’):** _t **o pluck the strings of an instrument, to sing, to praise.**_

*

In bed, Tony morphed himself into an instrument for Loki’s pleasure. Loki had learned all the ways to pluck at his strings, was a master at touching him exactly the right way to make him keen, to make him whimper, to draw out the sounds from him that he wanted to hear, and Tony held nothing back.

He sang.

He pleaded for Loki’s hands, for his mouth, for his cock. He cried out Loki’s name like a mantra, like an anthem, like it was the only thing keeping him together and if he stopped saying it he would disintegrate. Tony’s body writhed to the music of it, danced, in ecstasy, in celebration of everything Loki did to it, accepting it all and showing appreciation without reserve.

Tony had never been a quiet lover, but with Loki, he couldn’t stop himself, couldn’t stop murmuring praises of “ _so good, so damn good_ ,” and soft, wet entreaties of “ _more, please more_ ,” and Loki, the benevolent god that he was, always gave him what he asked for, what he begged for, until he was shaking apart, splintering at the very foundations, and thanking Loki for it.

In moments like these, he was beyond words, beyond thought, and was just a chord of a symphony. But a chord that played over and over again, every time, until it became the chorus, until it became a song of its own, a prayer, and one that was reserved for just one person.

For Loki.

* * *

**Halal (haw-lal’): _to shine, boast, rave about, celebrate or even to be clamorously foolish._**

*

So maybe Tony had had a little too much to drink.

It didn’t matter, because it was his party, and he was allowed to be inebriated if he so desired. And he desired is. Very much. Pepper would disagree with his assessment, but Tony was pretty sure Loki would be on his side.

Loki!

He turned around and found the man in question- not difficult, as he was standing right beside him- and moved until he was nestled against him, his nose pressing against Loki’s neck.

“You smell nice.” He inhaled happily. “Realllyyy nice.”

“I believe you might have consumed an overabundance of alcohol, Stark.”

Tony giggled. He would be embarrassed by that noise if he didn’t feel so warm and happy. Loki made a questioning sound so he explained. “I like it.”

“Like being drunk?”

“No.” Tony pulled back and looked at him. “Like the way you speak.”

The music band was playing something upbeat, and Tony looked around at the people, all dressed in pretentious clothing and talking to each other with fake, plastic smiles. He didn’t want to have any part in that. Which is why he had plastered himself to Loki’s side all evening, but the dreariness of the event was getting to him.

Tony Stark had a reputation to uphold. This couldn’t go on.

So he turned to his lover and asked, “Wanna dance?”

Loki looked around pointedly, and then back at Tony. “Nobody is dancing.”

Tony shrugged. “It’s my party.” He held out of his hand, and to his delight Loki took barely a moment before nodding and placing his hand in Tony’s, and let himself be pulled into an ill-advised impromptu dance.

Tony was drunk, so his co-ordination was shot to hell, but Loki had been holding out on him. He was an excellent dancer. Tony must have been looking at him accusingly because he chuckled. “Sometimes you forget that I am a prince. I was taught how to dance since childhood.”

Ah, so that explained it. “Is it weird that I find that hot?”

Loki chuckled again, his smile warm as he maneuvered Tony’s flailing limbs into something resembling a graceful turn with a skill that bordered on being magic. “Not with the amount of alcohol that’s still in your blood stream. No.”

Tony giggled again, and pulled himself closer to Loki, the music softening enough that they could get away with just swaying on the floor. Loki did smell extremely nice, his cool skin soothing against Tony’s cheek.

“People are watching,” Loki whispered in his ear, quiet, but he didn’t stop their motion. “Reporters as well. They have cameras.”

“Let them.” Tony didn’t care, not when he could feel Loki’s arms around him, keeping him safe. He had never been big on privacy anyway, and he wasn’t hiding Loki. “It’s my party.”

Loki’s arms tightened infinitesimally around him, and he felt Loki’s body lose some of its tension, making him sigh happily. He would’ve been content to stay in this position for hours, but then the music changed again and he got an idea. A sudden, brilliant, genius-level idea, if he did say so himself.

He pulled away gently, looking at Loki with bright eyes, and his lover knew him enough to look suddenly wary.

“Stark...”

“I… I need to do something.”

“What you need to do is hydrate yourself, and then sleep.”

“No. No. No. You’re gonna love this. Just… wait.”

Unsteadily, he turned around and walked towards the stage, the lead singer quieting down when he climbed up and gestured to him. Tony waited, and when all the band members did was look at each other in confusion, he walked closer and snatched the mic from the lead’s hand, muttering a quick, “Just gotta borrow it for a moment.”

Then he turned towards the audience and grinned. “Hello everyone. I hope you’re enjoying this dreadfully boring and pretentious party. Pepper tried her best, but you know what they say, parties are made by the people attending it and all that. At least the food is good.” He noticed people turning towards him, and felt a few cameras go off. Yeah. He hadn’t made news as anything other than Iron Man for a while. Pepper would be disappointed. Fury would be furious. That thought made him grin harder. “Do try the shrimps! You won’t regret it.”

When he had attention of most of the crowd, he rubbed the back of his neck and continued. “So, uh, I am here to sing. Apologies in advance, for my terrible singing voice, but it’s my party so I think we can all agree to cut me some slack.” He turned towards the band members and asked them in a hushed whisper. “You all know how to play ‘Under your spell’?” All but one nodded, and Tony gasped. “Heathen!” Then pointed to the guitarist next to him and said, “You! Educate him. Quickly.”

And then he turned back towards the crowd, and his eyes found Loki. “I know this is not a karaoke party- and hey! Why didn’t we think of this before? Next time we will definitely have a karaoke party, and in interest of fairness, if anyone else wants to sing after me, they are most welcome. But that’s for later. My turn now.” He cleared his throat, making sure everyone could hear it. “Loki… this one is for you.”

He made a gesture, which the band rightfully interpreted as cue to begin playing.

_  
_

_I lived my life in shadow_

_Never the sun on my face_

 

He heard scattered laughs from around the room, but he ignored them, and kept singing the song that was his not-so-guilty pleasure. Buffy kicked ass. He was not ashamed of being a fan.

_  
_

_I'm under your spell_

_Nothing I can do_

_You just took my soul with you_

 

He found Loki’s eyes and held them, oblivious to what everyone else was doing, swaying around his spot in what he hoped looked appealing but probably looked ridiculous with his lack of co-ordination. But Loki’s eyes were warm, and that’s all that mattered.

_  
_

_You make me believe!_

_You make me com-plete_

_You make me com-pleeeeete_

 

He put his energy into the last few lines, and winced at the way his voice cracked, off-tune. He tried looking for Loki again, disappointed to not find him there, but then he felt an arm wrap around his waist, and a hand slowly taking the microphone away from him.

“That’s enough, my dear. That’s it. Let’s go home now.”

Loki pulled him closer, balancing him, and Tony let himself be complacent, still signing the song under his breath as Loki took them down the stage and away from the prying eyes.

Tomorrow, he might feel embarrassed by the spectacle he had made of himself today. No. That wasn’t right. Embarrassment was not an emotion he was overly familiar with. So tomorrow he might question the appropriateness of his antics, but he doubted that he would regret them.

Loki was his, by some miraculous turn of fate, and he wanted everyone to know. If the sentiment made him act a little silly, then it was well worth it. Especially when he saw the smile on Loki’s face, and the way he placed a tender kiss on his forehead.

He selectively chose to ignore the “Ridiculous mortal,” comment Loki made, only because it sounded far too fond to be an insult.

* * *

**Shabach (Shaw-bakh’): _to shout, to address in a loud tone, to command, to triumph._**

*

“Loki, can you do it?” Cap’s voice was strained in the com, the background noise of steel clanging against steel jarring.

Tony was fighting the Hydra agents surrounding the reactor, trying to find his way in, but he was one against too many to count. He knew the rest of the team was in similar predicament.

“I already said I can, Captain. I have never given you any reason to doubt my abilities, so I would appreciate it if you refrain from questioning them.” Even though Loki’s tone was casual, Tony could hear the tension underneath it. Loki wasn’t as confident as he was pretending to be.

“I don’t doubt the fact that you can take the implosion device inside, but I need to know if you will be able to come back out. JARVIS did a scan that predicts that the radiations inside the reactor are going to mess with your magic, and you might not be able to rely on it.”

“I assure you, I am more than just my magic.”

“Dammit Loki, that’s not what Steve means.” Natasha’s voice was concerned too, and Tony spared a split second to feel touched at that. “Will you be able to make it out before the device detonates?”

Loki’s silence was telling. Tony incapacitated his opponent with a well-aimed blow to the head and held his breath. Eventually, he answered. “I believe so.”

“Unharmed?” That was Steve, and he really was growing if he had started noticing that Loki revealed more by what he didn’t say.

“I don’t see what other choice we have here.” Loki’s tongue was sharp again, defensive, and Tony barely held back a sigh. He wouldn’t interfere. He had promised. The last time he tried to stop Loki from doing something dangerous, the fall out had not been pretty. So he was heartened to know he was not the only one who gave a shit about Loki’s safety.

Somehow, after many stumbles and falls, they had finally learned to be a team.

Nobody said anything at that, but neither did Steve give Loki the all clear, so he sighed, and the next time he spoke, Loki was talking less venom and more logic. “Look. This reactor is unstable and poses a danger to a lot more people than just us, and Hydra has complete control over it. The radiations make it impossible for any of the mortals to get inside, so that leaves me. Any harm that comes my way, is the debt I owe to this planet, and I am willingly consenting to it.”

There it was again, the reminder. It didn’t sit well with any of them. In the beginning, the avengers, especially Clint, had found it just and fair that Loki suffered for all the suffering he had caused, but by now it felt uncomfortably like slavery.

“Dammit, I don’t like it,” Steve cursed, the swing of his shield loud as it felled another agent. His frustration with the situation was clear, but it was obvious to everyone that this was the only course of action available to them.

“And I am gratified to hear that, Captain.” Loki was smiling. Tony didn’t have to see his face to know that. The bastard was fighting off Hydra agents, was consenting to go inside an unstable reactor core, and he was smiling. “But the fact remains, you don’t have to like it to allow it.”

Helplessly, Tony grinned as well. He had fallen for the God of Chaos. He had always been aware of the consequences.

“Alright. Go. But get your ass back in one piece, and that’s an order.” Steve finally relented.

“Acknowledged, Captain.”

Tony knew this was his moment. In another second, Loki would teleport himself as close to the reactor core as his magic allowed, and would be out of the conversation range.

“Loki!” he shouted.

It felt like the rest of the avengers even stopped breathing, sudden hush falling over their com link, which was impossible with the fight going on around them. JARVIS honed in on the nearest cameras and Loki’s face appeared on the screen inside his face plate, showing him the God, the fight around him dwindling. The Hydra agents had learned to attack the easier targets.

“Stark.” Loki nodded, his countenance wary. Tony wanted to ask him to stop, wanted to forbid him from putting himself in danger, but if their situations were reversed, he would resent Loki for even suggesting that. So he didn’t. He held his tongue.

And said something else instead.

Something he was sure Loki already knew, but he hadn’t said it before. This felt like the right time.

“I love you.”

Loud and honest, for everyone to hear. It was both a plea and a command, for Loki to survive, to come back to him, to this, and by the widening of Loki’s eyes on the screen, he knew Loki understood that.

Loki grinned, his teeth sharp, his lips curling around a vicious pleasure. “See you soon,” he said, before vanishing from the screen.

Tony laughed, already giddy on victory. Clint finally broke the silence, gagging. “Get a room.”

“We plan to.” Tony laughed again, as they kept fighting steadily, waiting.

They didn’t have to wait long, because Loki kept his word. Soon the ground under their feet trembled, and the reactor collapsed in on itself, as the implosion device Tony and Bruce had spent the past few weeks developing  stabilized the core, and then made the place implode.

Tony whooped in delighted triumph, shouting Loki’s name when he materialized next to him. He looked shaken and pale, but alive, and Tony didn’t waste another moment before grabbing him by his shoulders and kissing him senseless.

* * *

 

**Agape- ἀγάπη: _unconditional "God" love_**

*

Loki was born a prince. More than that, he was born a deity- because even monsters had their own place among the divine beings. And then, for millenniums, he was raised as a god, entitled by his birthright to the simpering devotions of the mortals.

So he knew more than enough about worship. He had been a focus of it for far longer than he cared for.

He had learned early on that- unlike Thor who rejoiced in it- he cared little for such displays. They were tedious at best, and downright pathetic at worst. They put him on a pedestal and thought if they burned enough candles around his image, spilled enough blood in his name, he would be pleased.

Frequently, he was disgusted.

Later, he thought he had figured out the cause for it. Monsters were never made to be worshiped after all. It had always been the arena of the gods.

But then he met the mortal named Tony Stark.

He raised his hands for him, and Loki felt like he was being lifted up by them, was flying. He reached for him, tentative, and Loki knew he would place his very heart in that palm if that was what Tony asked for. He knelt for him, and Loki’s knees felt weak, wanting to take all the weight off the mortal’s shoulders that might ever made them bow. He praised him, sang for him, made an utter fool of himself for him, and Loki felt like he was being broken and being remade, into the god he had once deluded himself to be , into something that he never thought he could be, never thought he wanted to be.

Tony loved him.

And Loki loved him back.

Because if a god’s wrath was swift and fierce, without mercy, his love was sharper, stronger, deeper than the roots of Yggdrasil, more eternal than the very foundations of the tree that kept the realms together.

Some days, he sat in bed and watched his mortal breathe, watched the rise and fall of his chest, and swore to never lose this. He would move the heavens, rip apart the fabric of the universe, and fight Lady Death herself, if she tried to take this mortal away from him. He didn’t know what would remain of him if he was forced to part with this man.

Because once, he was a monster. That one was real, before his very existence became a lie, before he was forced to become so many things that he had lost count: a lie smith, a trickster, a murderer, a war criminal, a puppet, a would-be-god, lies over deception over insanity, until he didn’t even know what he was supposed to be anymore, still feeling lost in the same the way he had felt while swimming through the black vastness of the void.

Until he was found by bright brown eyes, and a heart that glowed in a cool blue light.

Now he knew what he was… he was Stark’s.

Surprisingly, it didn’t rankle him to be owned, because for once in his life this was a fair exchange. Because Stark was his too.                                             

**Author's Note:**

> This story fought me tooth and nail, and I am really glad I finally managed to finish it. If you enjoyed it, please leave a comment letting me know. Those comments are what keep us writers walking through the dark tunnel of writer's block at times, shining like the hopeful light at the end of the tunnel, calling to us.


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